A Monograph on the Golden Rule

A Brief Inquiry into the Logical Implications of the Golden Rule
(Or: Do we really want people to do unto us as they would have us do unto them?)

The Golden Rule is one of the oldest and best known attempts to reduce all moral and ethical issues to a single, simple statement of moral imperative. As with many heuristic shorthands, it is surprisingly successful at resolving the majority of situations to which it is applied. However, it needs to be seen for the rough "rule of thumb" that it is, rather than accepting it as a moral law of universal applicability.

Although the Golden Rule "feels good", if it is to be used as a rule of action, it should be examined logically. In order to determine how any logical rule has been derived, one must observe the premises upon which it is based. As will be demonstrated by example, below, the Golden Rule is dependent on two premises in particular that are either far from universal, or are simply untrue:

1) that everyone wishes to be treated the same as everyone else; and

2) that everyone wishes to be treated identically by everyone else.

Neither are postulates which will withstand rigorous investigation.
As with most simplifications of extremely complex subjects, the Golden Rule works best when applied to simple situations. Do we want to be treated politely? Then we should, as the Golden Rule says, treat others politely. Do we wish that people would not steal from us? Then we should not steal from others.

However, morality and ethics are among the most complex fields of human behavior. Universal or dogmatic application of this simple "rule" to all human interactions is not an acceptable substitute for conscious inquiry as to the best moral course of action in any given situation. Such can be demonstrated by observing the application of the Golden Rule to situations where such application results in unacceptable ethical actions.

1) Don’t Do Unto Me what you want everyone to Do Unto You!

The most glib and glaring example of the failure of the Golden Rule is the case of masochists; which is also the obvious example of the failure of the postulate that everyone wishes to be treated the same as everyone else. Most people do not like being spanked; either physically or emotionally. However, some people do. If such people were to do unto others as they would have others do unto them, then there would be a whole lot of unwelcome spanking going on. This is hardly the result that a universal rule of moral behavior should mandate.

Masochism is an easy target. It may be argued that masochists are psychologically disturbed and that the Golden Rule wasn’t meant to apply to them. Such a limitation of its application, however, takes a bigger bite out of the Rule, and its simplicity, than may be apparent. Restated to account for this exception, the Rule would be "People who are not psychologically disturbed should do unto others as they would have others do unto them".

This formulation opens a Pandora’s Box: how do we define who is psychologically disturbed? And who makes the decision? I’m sure many masochists would not agree that they are; maintaining rather that masochism is a "lifestyle choice". And if we define "the psychologically disturbed" broadly enough to save the Rule we may end up with a moral rule that applies only to those who don’t need a rule to behave appropriately.

Nor is masochism the only challenge to the universality of the Rule or to the postulate that everyone wishes to be treated the same as everyone else.
Let’s look at a less sensational example: huggers. Some people, who are not generally considered to be psychologically disturbed, seem to love to hug and to be hugged. Others, who also are not generally considered to be psychologically disturbed, prefer more personal space and do not enjoy being squeezed, for instance, by a large woman reeking of perfume with whom they are barely acquainted. But if one applies the Golden Rule to a hugger at a social function ... since the hugger would very much like to have others, even near strangers, hug her ... the Rule directs her to embrace everyone in sight (and to invade the space of non-huggers and make them uncomfortable) ... whether they want it or not.

There are myriad other examples: naturists may wish others would display their bodies in the naturists’ presence ... so if they follow the Rule, it would be okay, indeed mandated, that the naturists wander around naked regardless of who they offend. Communalists may believe it perfectly fine for others to borrow their possessions without permission, thus giving them the right, even the duty, under the Rule to similarly borrow from others. Cigarette smokers may wish and prefer that others would smoke around them; ergo the Rule says they should light up in the presence of others – even those who do not want them to do so.

The point of the examples is to demonstrate the flaws in the inherent premise of the Rule that everyone wishes to be treated the same as everyone else; ie: that the "you" of the Rule and the "others" whom "you" do unto, each wish to have the same things done unto them. The premise must fail, and with it the universality of the Golden Rule.

2) Don’t Do Unto Me just because you would like me to Do Unto You!

The other primary premise failure of the Rule is that everyone wishes to be treated identically by everyone else. Indeed, this premise is almost universally false.

How we wish to be treated by a dear friend or lover is very different than how we may wish to be treated by a stranger or an enemy. Yet the Rule makes no allowance for any differences. So long as our lovers and enemies are clearly defined and each of us sees the other in the same perspective, the Rule may work well enough, and the failure of this premise is not obvious. For instance, we may want our lover to greet us with a kiss. Presumably, there would not usually be an obvious ethical glitch if we followed the Rule and therefore greeted our lover with a kiss. (Although depending on potentially differing attitudes towards public displays of affection, this could still run afoul of premise no. 1, above. See, eg: huggers.)

The more obvious failure of the premise, and the Rule, is when we do not share the same perspective on our relationship with the others we are to do unto. The following example will illustrate.

If Jim is very interested in and desirous of Mary, the Golden Rule may allow, even mandate, that he approach her, touch her and act in other ways towards her which she finds distasteful and disturbing; perhaps even repulsive. Yet Jim would be simply doing unto her what he would have her do unto him. Indeed, with the Rule as his guide, Jim may honestly take actions which would violate all accepted moral norms of behavior.

Mary may appreciate exactly those actions from Ben, whom she desires, even though those same acts from Jim repulse her.

Because we do not wish to be treated identically by everyone, and, indeed, want some "others" to do unto us as we very much would not want other "others" to do, the Rule’s universality fails.

Nor does the example need to be so dramatic. Most people have a large range of how they would like to be treated ... depending upon who is doing the treating. In order for the formulation of the Golden Rule to be sensible, each such desire would have to be identically reflected by each "other". In other words, it only works if the treatment that you wish to receive from each individual with whom you interact is exactly the same as the treatment that individual wishes to receive from you. And vice versa.
Since the odds of such perfect mirroring are zilch, the Rule fails in all but the most simplistic of circumstances.

Given the significant flaws in the two essential premises of the Rule which render it suspect at best as a guide for moral behavior, the question arises as to whether there is, perhaps, a "better" rule. Perhaps rather than an "activist" mandate that instructs us to do unto others, we would be better off morally and ethically with a rule that proscribed such doing.
I submit for consideration the following. Call it the Platinum Rule.

"Don’t do unto others unless you know that they want you to so do."

It might not make everyone actively polite. But it would keep people from stealing or being actively rude at least as well as the Golden Rule. And it would keep masochists or would-be lovers or huggers from doing unto us what we’d really rather not have done.